Ten distinguished expats who've collectively lost more money to each other than to their kids' international school fees. These are their stories.
Founder & CEO
Professional Background
Regional sales manager who treats Thursday poker like a FTSE 100 board meeting. Brings laminated hand charts from his last trip to London. Has memorized pot odds but still can't read Bill's obvious tells.
Chief Technology Officer
Professional Background
Tech support guru who hosts the game and maintains the website. Provides the venue, the Wi-Fi password, and the excuses when the site crashes. Has home field advantage but still manages to lose to Bill's miraculous rivers.
Chief Financial Officer
Professional Background
Gibraltar-based accountant who plays poker like he handles offshore accounts - extremely carefully and boringly. Has folded pocket kings preflop "just to be safe." Still somehow complains about bad beats.
Californian Real Estate Mogul
Professional Background
Californian real estate mogul "expanding his Mediterranean portfolio." Treats every hand like a deal memo, complete with ROI projections and talk of escrow. Tries to turn each Thursday into a networking event and brings Napa wines no one asked for.
Head of Banking & Finance
Professional Background
Estate agent specializing in "luxury villas" in Nueva Andalucía. Plays poker like he sells property - with overwhelming enthusiasm and questionable ethics. Bluffs with terrible hands just to "keep things interesting."
Director of Refreshments & Hospitality
Professional Background
The luckiest player alive. Wins with the worst hands, rivers the nuts consistently, and claims he doesn't know the rules. Also in charge of refreshments, which means he brings whatever's on sale at Morrison's. Suspected of making a deal with the poker gods.
Human Resources Director
Professional Background
Wealth manager for expat clients who's perpetually distracted by Asian market updates. Has folded pocket aces while checking Hong Kong futures. Always has to leave early for "conference calls with Singapore."
Gaming Industry Young Gun
Professional Background
A young gun from Gibraltar making waves in the gaming industry. Brings fearless aggression, faster math than the veterans, and just enough swagger to make every all-in feel personal.
LSE Student Strategist
Professional Background
LSE student with spreadsheets for everything and a ten-year plan to take over the world. Studies game theory by day and tries to apply it to every pot by night.
Director of Creative Bluffing
Professional Background
A bluffer of great skill who can represent any hand with absolute conviction. Somehow makes everyone fold the winner, then smiles like it was obvious all along.
Combined Age
371 years
Wisdom not guaranteed
Total Marriages
7
All still intact (miraculously)
Kids in College
11
Tuition > Poker winnings
Reading Glasses Required
6/7
Louie refuses to admit it